What I Want for My Children

Faith 17

 

Mother and Child
by Gladiola Sotomayor

         At first glance, this title may seem an odd choice as part of a series on faith. But as you will see in a moment, there is a valid tie-in. At the same time, I think this will be a practical/philosophical help to parents of young children. Let us press forward then.

          I Timothy is a book written to pastors. In it, Paul tells Timothy what a pastor ought to do/not do, be/not be, and what a pastor ought to emphasize in his ministry. Paul also gives him instruction regarding different groups of people in the church. In chapter two, Paul does this in relation to women in the church. In verse eight he speaks of the importance of modesty and a certain deferential femininity. In verse nine Paul emphasizes that women ought to be busy serving others. In verse ten, however, he minimizes that service in the area of the church, specifically in the preaching arena. He proceeds in verses thirteen and fourteen to furnish the reason for this proscription, namely that women are more prone to be spiritually deceived while men are more prone to be spiritually rebellious. All of which brings me to the verse I want to emphasize in this post, I Timothy 2.15: Notwithstanding she shall be saved in childbearing, if they continue in faith and charity and holiness with sobriety. In essence, Paul is telling Timothy that a woman should not focus on leading the church. She should focus on her home, and specifically on her children. I believe the companion passage in Titus 2.3-5 bears out that point of emphasis.

          My purpose in this blog post, though, is not to write about a woman’s place in the home. I want, instead, to focus on the specifics of I Timothy 2.15. In it, Paul is telling Timothy that a woman’s life will have the most meaning and accomplishment if her children grow up to love and serve the Lord. More precisely, Paul is telling a mother what to want for her children.

          It never ceases to amaze me what people want for their children. Naturally, they desire for their children more than they had, but often if not almost those desires are unscriptural at best and dangerous at worst. A book on Amazon entitled “What Do You Really Want for Your Children?” by Wayne Dyer has 79 reviews and a 4.7 rating out of a potential five. Going solely by his chapter titles, Wayne thinks you ought to want your children to value themselves, to be risk-takers, to be self-reliant, to be free from anxiety, to have peaceful lives, to celebrate present moments, to be physically well, to be creative, and to feel a sense of purpose. Many of these sound noble but Dr. Dyer has missed the point by a wide margin. God reveals something simple and higher for us in the Word of God. We should want them to continue in faith and charity and holiness with sobriety.

          The first thing we ought to want for our children is faith. What is faith? It is seeing with your heart. It is not that I want my children to be illogical. It is rather that when my children are forced to choose between what God says and what the logical evidence of their senses show them I want them to choose what God says. I want them to walk by faith and belief in Him, not by sight. Faith is also stepping out on the belief. Faith and doubt are usually mixed together. Rarely is faith present without some doubt being present as well. But the person of faith, while doubting, still steps out on the belief. I want my children to act on their faith in God. I want them to step out and live a life that takes God at His Word.

          The second thing we ought to desire for our children is charity. It is to live a life of love. What do I want them to love? Whatever God tells them they ought to love – God Himself, their neighbor, the Word of God, the lost souls of men, one another, their husband/wife, and their own children. All of these are specifically commanded or at least strongly implied and exemplified in the Scripture.

          The third thing we should want for our children is holiness. What is holiness? I answer this in detail in my book, “Freed From Sin,” but simply put, holiness is being like God. It is having God’s moral character of purity. Holiness is yielding yourself to God rather than yielding to your own fleshly desires. Holiness is walking in the Spirit. Holiness is obeying God from the heart. Holiness is being a partaker of the divine nature, not becoming god but becoming like God. In short, we ought to long for our children to grow up to be like Jesus.

          The fourth thing we should desire for our children is sobriety. As I understand that term in context it means to be serious about life. This does not mean my children cannot laugh, that they must slowly toil, grim-faced, until death closes their eyes in a final rest. No, it means that they ought to live a serious life, carefully, with a purpose, undertaking their responsibilities in a serious, mature manner.

          Having briefly examined these instructions found in the epistle, I come to one final thought. It is not enough for us to wait until our children grow up to expect them to love and serve God. If they are to continue in these spiritual graces when they are older we must begin with them now, at whatever age they may be. Now is when they are moldable. Now is when our influence will have the greatest impact, not in five or ten years, but now.

I do not know who wrote this piece, but it does summarize the urgency involved in such parental tasks:

I took a piece of plastic clay

And idly fashioned it one day,

And as my fingers pressed it still,

It moved and yielded to my will.

I came again when days were past–

The bit of clay was hard at last;

The form I gave it, it still bore,

But I could change that form no more.

I took a piece of living clay

And gently formed it day by day,

And molded with my power and art

A young child’s soft and yielding heart.

Breaking Home Ties
by Norman Rockewell

I came again when years were gone–

It was a man I looked upon;

He still that early impress wore,

And I could change him nevermore.

          My eldest son finished high school this year. He set about the task of assembling his life. What will it look like, I wonder? I know not, but I do know what I want for him – faith, charity, holiness, and sobriety. And if that is what we want in our children, beloved, we must set about instilling it early and often.

          There is not greater task. There is no harder job you will ever love so much. Let it be done according to the Word of God, and may He bless it by forming our children in the mold of Paul’s instructions to young Timothy nigh on two thousand years ago.