Marriage Is a Comfort

 

Marriage 4

 

          In beginning this series on marriage, I have attempted to emphasize God's view of marriage. This is because our view of marriage is often faulty, formed through some less-than-ideal manner. Thus far, we have noted that God's original intent for marriage was to banish loneliness, establish sweet intimacy, and for the wife to be her husband's helpmeet. Building off that, we saw that God views marriage as a commitment last time. Today, we will discover that God views marriage as a comfort.

          Numerous jokes imply that the marriage state is a painful one. Even an incomplete search for such things quickly yields finds such as these:

“My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.”

-Rodney Dangerfield

“Getting married is a lot like getting into a tub of hot water. After you get used to it, it ain't so hot.”

-Minnie Pearl

"I haven't spoken to my wife in years. I didn't want to interrupt her."

-Rodney Dangerfield

"The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open."

-Groucho Marx

“Do you know what it means to come home at night to a woman who'll give you a little love, a little affection, a little tenderness? It means you're in the wrong house, that's what it means.”

-Henny Youngman

“Alimony - The ransom that the happy pay to the devil.”

-H.L. Mencken

"My wife has a slight impediment in her speech. Every now and then she stops to breathe."

-Jimmy Durante

"I never married because I have three pets at home that answer the same purpose as a husband. I have a dog that growls every morning, a parrot that swears all afternoon and a cat that comes home late at night."

-Marie Corelli

“The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.”

-Henny Youngman

“If you want to sacrifice the admiration of many men for the criticism of one, go ahead, get married.”

-Katharine Hepburn

"I never knew what real happiness was until I got married. And by then it was too late."

-Max Kauffmann

"Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays."

-Henny Youngman

          I confess I am probably guilty of exploiting the subject of marriage for a cheap laugh or two myself, but the scriptural truth is that marriage is not a life sentence; it is a comfort. My wife is not "the old ball and chain" or "the battle axe." Your husband is not the dreamboat that became a shipwreck. Marriage is not an instrument of medieval torture akin to the rack; it is a beautiful tapestry woven of threads of cheerfulness, contentment, enjoyment, happiness, peace, pleasure, rest, satisfaction, and warmth.

          We see examples of this in Scripture on the positive and negative sides. Isaac found solace in his marriage to Rebekah. And Isaac brought her into his mother Sarah’s tent, and took Rebekah, and she became his wife; and he loved her: and Isaac was comforted after his mother’s death. (Genesis 24.67) Job, on the other hand, found added misery in his marriage. And he took him a potsherd to scrape himself withal; and he sat down among the ashes. Then said his wife unto him, Dost thou still retain thine integrity? curse God, and die. (Job 2.8-9)

          I know what it is like to walk in the door of my home at night, weary and burdened with the cares of the day. In Eddy Arnold's immortal words, I want someone to "make the world go away, and get it off my shoulders; say the things you used to say, and make the world go away." And this is precisely what my family, led by my wife, does. I am home, the world is shut out, and nothing else matters. Mandy is my Rebekah.

          Did you know that you are supposed to enjoy your marriage? Live joyfully with the wife whom thou lovest all the days of the life of thy vanity, which he hath given thee under the sun. (Ecclesisates 9.9) Did you know God describes marriage as a good thing? Whose findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the Lord. (Proverbs 18.22) Marriage is not an institution of suffering. Marriage is not a looming disaster on the horizon. It is a joyful, peaceful, blessed, good thing created by God for the comfort of men and women. In fact, God views marriage as a bit of Heaven on Earth. In Matthew 9.15, 22.9, and 25.1, Jesus repeatedly equates the kingdom of God to marriage. This is later expanded on in Revelation repeatedly.

Re 19:7  Let us be glad and rejoice, and give honour to him: for the marriage of the Lamb is come, and his wife hath made herself ready.

Re 19:9  And he saith unto me, Write, Blessed are they which are called unto the marriage supper of the Lamb. And he saith unto me, These are the true sayings of God.

Re 21:2  And I John saw the holy city, new Jerusalem, coming down from God out of Heaven, prepared as a bride adorned for her husband.

Re 21:9  And there came unto me one of the seven angels which had the seven vials full of the seven last plagues, and talked with me, saying, Come hither, I will shew thee the bride, the Lamb’s wife.

Re 22:17  And the Spirit and the bride say, Come. And let him that heareth say, Come. And let him that is athirst come. And whosoever will, let him take the water of life freely.

          Marriage is such a great blessing that when God wanted something to compare the joy and blessing of an eternity in Heaven to on an earthly scale, He chose marriage.

          Some of us have become so colored by our past experiences or the prevailing culture of our day that we have trouble wrapping our minds around this. I am not denying that a good marriage takes incredible hard work. I am not denying there is often pain in marriage. I do not deny that every marriage comprises two imperfect, selfish people. But I am denying that our view of marriage ought to be negative.

          Often, all that is necessary for real change is to change your attitude about something. Many years ago, before Mandy and I had children, I said something to the effect that I thought newborn babies were ugly. She did not berate me. Instead, she looked at me and said simply, "You won't think that about your own babies." Nor did I. Now, to me, all newborns are beautiful. They did not change, but my attitude toward them did.

          When my attitude changed, what was once distasteful to me became a marvel of joy, beauty, and blessing. If your view of marriage is a negative one, I urge you to trade in your view of marriage for God's view of marriage.

Mandy and I are on our wedding day.

          Do you remember how you felt the day you got married? A little nervous. A little excited. A lot happy. Which is a bridegroom coming out of his chamber, and rejoiceth as a strong man to run a race. (Psalm 19.5) Recapture that. Look at your marriage like God looks at your marriage. It is a good thing designed by Him to bless and comfort you.

          Change your mind. Rejoice in your marriage.